Breakups

5 Ways to Ease the Pain of a Breakup

First of all let me say that breakups suck and I’m sorry if you’re going through one. On the other hand, if you and your man just broke up then obviously it wasn’t meant to be, but I’m excited for the fact that you’re about to move on, rediscover yourself, and find the right person for you. Breakups can be the worst time in your life, but they can also be a wonderful moment of transformation and growth…if you let them be.

If you’re reading this and you’re going through your first ever breakup, take a deep breath and brace yourself. Breakups hurt like a bitch. But what you probably don’t realize now is that this breakup is not going to kill you. You’re going to make it through this tough time and be happy (probably even happier!) again in no time. If you’re reading this and it’s not your first breakup, you may be searching for some advice on how to ease the pain a little quicker than last time. If you follow these 5 simple tips, you’ll quickly be on your way to happiness again!

1. Give Yourself One Day 

Give yourself one day of being a wreck. One day to cry as much as you want, drink as much wine as you want, look over as many old pictures and videos with your ex as you want, say that you’ll never survive, love again, or date anyone else ever again as many times as you want. Basically, you get the day to just feel as bad for yourself as you need to. Give yourself this one day. You need it! Let all those feelings come out. Experience them in all their shitiness and then tell yourself that tomorrow you’re going to pull your shit together and get on with your life. Wake up the next morning knowing that you got to wallow in self-pity the day before and that today is a new day to put all of it behind you. Cue Sara Evans’ song, “A Little Bit Stronger.”

2. Stay Away From His Social Media

Now that you’ve felt all the feels and you’re on the way to becoming happier, don’t make it any harder than it needs to be. AKA, don’t check his Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or Snapchat. If you’re like me, you won’t be able to not check it. So go ahead and unfriend him, unfollow him, and delete his number. It seems extreme, but usually, it’s the best thing you can do for yourself. This isn’t about pretending he doesn’t exist or never did exist, it’s about giving yourself the space and sanity you need during this time to begin letting go.

3. Stay busy

Keep your schedule packed. Whether it’s meeting up with girlfriends, lunch dates, going to the library, visiting a museum or seeing a show, keep yourself busy! Remember, if you have nothing to do, he’s going to pop into your head. If you’re busy, you may feel some sadness, but it won’t consume you. Don’t allow yourself to linger in the pain.

4. Get Physical

Get involved in some sort of physical activity like yoga, Pilates, Zumba, the gym, barre classes, etc. These are great schedule fillers. Plus, physical activity gives you endorphins that make you happier and healthier. You’ll also end up with a banging breakup bod, which is always a cherry on top of a shitty breakup.

5. Spend Time With Your Friends and Family

Yes, finding and spending time with a rebound guy may help ease the sadness, but you’re basically just using him as a means to cover up the pain that you feel from your breakup. And let me tell you from experience, that pain is going to resurface sooner or later. And when it does, it’s going to hurt like hell. So instead of going for the rebound dude, opt to spend time with your girls or family instead. They’ll give you the love and laughter you need to heal the pain, not just stuff it down to deal with later.

If you lived together, here’s my last piece of advice for you. Consider rearranging your room or apartment. Use the same furniture and decor that you had but move it around. Feng Shui Diagram the shit out of your room. Or go all out and replace some old items with new ones. Space rearranging is a great project that helps to clear the energy of a breakup. Organize and beautify your surroundings, and I promise it will make you feel a million times better!

My lovelies, lastly, don’t make this breakup about him. Make it about you and your happiness. He’s not your one and only, so don’t cry over him too much. Take this as an opportunity to grow and flourish. The next time you have a hard breakup, these 5 tips will ease the process of healing and put a smile back on your face in no time.

A Massachusetts native who fell in love with New York City. Writer of poetry and short stories. Wannabe philosopher. Obsessed with red wine, chocolate covered strawberries and thinking about the universe. Dedicated to healthy eating and conscious living.

Check out her personal site for more!

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