Long Love

5 Reasons He Hasn’t Proposed Yet

If you’re reading this, you’re probably in a long-term relationship and awaiting that ever so coveted diamond ring. Before you start panicking because he hasn’t proposed yet, you need to know where he stands on the marriage matter – not just in terms of you and him, but marriage in general. This means having an honest conversation with your guy and asking those tough questions like, if he even believes in marriage? Does he want to get married? What was his parents’ marriage like? If you already know that your man wants to get married but he still hasn’t popped the question, you may be rock-less and wondering why. Here are 5 possible reasons why he hasn’t proposed yet.

1. He’s Feeling pressured

Maybe from you. Maybe from his family. Maybe from the sheer fact that this is what he’s supposed to do or supposed to want. Nobody likes to be told what to do, especially when it comes to something that will change the rest of their life. All the pressure could be turning your man away from the idea of proposing. Give him the mental space he needs to execute the proposal at his own pace.

2. He has a goal he wishes to achieve first

Although you probably want your rock now, your man may want to achieve a particular goal before he proposes. For example, he may want to wait until he gets a promotion or graduates from school. Trust me when I say that this is a good thing! An ambitious guy who works to make his dreams come true will also help to make your dreams come true. Support him. Practice patience. And most of all, be grateful that you’re with a man who has goals and also has the drive to reach for them.

3. He’s just not ready

The reason why he hasn’t proposed may have nothing to do with you. Instead, it could stem from him being scared (of you not saying yes, of his financial situation, of divorce, etc.). Maybe he thinks you haven’t been dating for long enough. Maybe he’s not sure about blending families. His hesitation could be a sign that he takes marriage seriously…which is an admirable trait. But on the other hand, after a few years of “not being ready,” his hesitation could be a warning sign that he’ll never be ready.

4. He doesn’t have $$ for the perfect ring yet

If your man is very hush-hush about the whole engagement situation, he could be in the process of saving up to buy you the perfect ring. Although they don’t usually understand our jewelry obsession, men know without a doubt that the ring matters. There is a ridiculous amount of pressure on a man to get his lady a beautiful ring. Think about it…when you tell your mom, friends, or even a stranger that you got engaged, they immediately ask to see the hardware. Talk about nerve-racking if you’re the one who picked it out!

5. He’s afraid of commitment

Now this is a cringe-worthy situation. A man who wants to get married but is too afraid of the commitment can be a nightmare in disguise. Run for the hills! Just kidding, don’t run. At least not right away. It’s not common that a man will admit to his fear of commitment, so you’re going to have to do some observational digging to find out if this is his issue. If your detective skills lead you to the conclusion that he is a commitment-phobe, then it’ll be your choice whether or not to wait for him to come to his senses. That being said, you can’t wait around forever.


So there it is. Some of the possible reasons why he hasn’t proposed yet. If you’re feeling discouraged by this list, here’s an extra one for you… your man actually isn’t scared or feeling pressured at all, he’s just waiting for the perfect moment to pop the question. So on that note, stop moping around! Be patient and it will happen when it’s supposed to.

A Massachusetts native who fell in love with New York City. Writer of poetry and short stories. Wannabe philosopher. Obsessed with red wine, chocolate covered strawberries and thinking about the universe. Dedicated to healthy eating and conscious living.

Check out her personal site for more!


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