Does the “No Contact Rule” Really Work?

As I’m sure you know, there are endless spoken rules when it comes to whether or not you should get back together with an ex. Amongst them is the “no contact rule.” If you’ve been living under a rock and have no idea what in the hell this rule is, I’ll explain it. This rule is the idea that for 30 full days, you have absolutely no contact with your ex (or current lover with whom you’re quarreling).

That’s 30 days of no texting, calling, snapping, tweeting, FaceBooking, messaging. NOTHING. But does this ridiculous rule actually work for fixing the problems and making it easier to decide if you should get back together? Eh, we’ll see. Here’s what you should know about it, first.

1. You’ll be Able to Think Clearly

When you’re still with an ex, you absolutely can’t think clearly about what you want. You’ll always have them affecting you emotionally when they’re always talking to you. Getting away from them allows you to think without their influence so you can make the right choice for you.


2. You’ll Have Time to Reconnect with Friends

You know what I’m talking about. If you’re in a serious relationship, you’ve lost touch with a few friends. Don’t even lie to yourself. Getting away from them is going to free your time to reconnect with lost friends. And being with friends always has a way of making you understand what you really want and deserve.

3. You’ll be Able to Decide if You Actually Miss Them

There’s a huge difference between being used to a person’s presence and actually missing them. Sorry to break it to you, sweetheart, but you could just be too used to them being around. When you force them out of your life, you’ll be able to tell if you really miss being around them or if you’re just too used to them being around to adjust living without them.


4. You Can See How Your Overall Life Changes Without Them

Does it change for the better or does it get shitty, sad, and lifeless? I trust you’ll be able to tell what either means and that will help you realize what you need in your life.


5. Reintroduce Yourself to Old Hobbies

How many hobbies did you give up to be with your significant other? How much have you put aside to spend more time with them? Reintroducing yourself to the hobbies that you shouldn’t have given up in the first place will bring some happiness back into your life. It could be what’s really missing and making unhappy and not your significant other.


The no contact rule may work for some in order to determine if getting back together is a good idea, but always keep in mind that not talking about your problems doesn’t mean they go away. Fix your shit if you want your relationship to succeed.

Just your not so average introvert extraordinaire. Lover of all things food, travel, fitness, and love related. If you want to see her best disappearing act, just give her a book and a blanket. Freelance writer. Aspiring author. Laugher. Lover. Pretty cool lady (I promise).

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