Single Mingling

How to Flirt like You Mean It

If you’re wondering how to subtly, yet somehow obviously, put the moves on someone new, fear not. We’re here to help you through this. Fliritng may not be easy for everyone out there, but with some guidance, it can definitely be effective. Throw on your cutest outfit and follow these simple tips.

1. Gain Confidence

To flirt like you truly mean it, you need to believe that you are the best person to grace their presense that day. People are not attracted to insecurity, so don’t try to get someone’s attention by self-deprecation. AKA, pitying yourself and your insecurities by attracting unnecessary attention to them is a big no-no. Put that crap away. It’s not doing you any justice! On a different note, thinking that you’re the greatest thing on earth is also not the best way to go. Gain confidence, but don’t be cocky.

2. Show Interest

This one should be obvious, but apparently in today’s world it needs to be laid out explicitly. If you’re thinking of someone, show them that you’re thinking of them! Don’t play into the millennial game of who cares less. Go ahead and text them first. If you’re too shy for a, “Hey, how are you?” text then just send them an article that you think they’d like or a snapchat of something that you’ve talked about before. We’re all scared of rejection, but the best thing you can do is put yourself out there. If potential new beau doesn’t text you back, they’re not the one for you anyways.

3. Playful Teasing

Teasing someone is the OG version of flirting. Think back to your kindergarten days. Remember when you ate little bae’s oreos at snack time or when you giggled and told them they were bad at coloring even though they were the best in the class. Take toddler-you as inspiration. That being said, you aren’t a child anymore so you have to know when the teasing is too much. Helpful hint: don’t tease someone about their insecurities. If you do, your flirting attempts may leave you solo as ever. Tease them about the things you actually like about them.

4. Initiate Physical Contact

Physical touch is key. Do enough to show them that you’re interested but little enough to leave them wanting more. Get physical in simple but noticeable ways. Touch their back or arm. Run your hands through their hair (granted that there are no products in it). These moves may seem like they came from elementary school, but if you make someone wait for the good stuff, they’re more likely to get hooked on you. Here’s an extra bonus: physical touch creates bonding and when you give it to them and then take it back, they’ll be itching to get closer to you again.


We know that flirting can be stressful for some (as weird as that may sound for others). Bottomline is to stay true to yourself, be playful, and keep a little mystery when it comes to the physical stuff.

A Massachusetts native who fell in love with New York City. Writer of poetry and short stories. Wannabe philosopher. Obsessed with red wine, chocolate covered strawberries and thinking about the universe. Dedicated to healthy eating and conscious living.

Check out her personal site for more!


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