I think we all know just how dangerous jealousy can be in a relationship. It can be the cause of arguments, insecurity, and it may even end up ruining an otherwise happy and healthy relationship. If any of you girls out there are struggling with a jealous boyfriend, here’s how you can deal with it.
1. Talk to Him About it
Look ladies (and gents!) communication is the key and foundation to every relationship. It’s quite possible he hasn’t realized that he’s acting like too much of a macho-man and might need a reminder that he is your number one and not that other guy who always likes your selfies. Being jealous often stems from either feeling under-appreciated or insecure, and sometimes they go hand in hand.
I’ve been there, fought that. The way I got through the jealous-escapades was quite honestly one thing: communication! When your other half knows that you will lay it all out on the table for them rather than leave them to imagine unlikely situations in their heads, they will also likely be more willing to talk to about their insecurities rather than revert to all out jealousy.
2. Remind Him You Each Have Your Own Friends
Sure, their jealousy might be cute for the first little while but eventually, it’s going to get old. You shouldn’t have to worry about your significant other breathing down your neck if you want to catch up with an old friend. I’m against the notion that when you’re in a relationship, you have to forgo any friends of the opposite gender.
There are definitely certain rules of respect you should follow when you’re in a relationship, and there should be a clear line of friendship that isn’t crossed. But other than that, having trust is one of the most important parts of a relationship. However, this goes both ways. If you get to talk to old friends, your partner should be able to as well, so make sure you have that conversation on what you are both comfortable with!
3. Time Away is Important
We all know that in the core of every woman lies their best friend. It’s important to be able to get out of the house and confide in your best gal pal! Time apart from your boyfriend will help him with his jealousy as well because he is forced to share you with someone else in general. This goes hand in hand. While you’re out spending time with your friends, let him spend time with his! Don’t be mad about football night or a crazy online gaming session where they eat way too much pizza.
(Let’s be honest, though, is there ever enough pizza?). A lot of the time, if you aren’t okay with him spending time with his friends, he won’t be okay with you spending time with yours. Learn to let go of each other enough to get a nice breath of fresh air into what otherwise can become quite a suffocating relationship.
4. Introduce Them to the People They’re Jealous of
Invite him to join you and while spending time with the person he’s jealous of. If you make it clear to people that he’s the only man for you, you’ll raise his confidence and hopefully make his need to be possessive over you lessen. Put yourself in his shoes. You don’t want to feel like the third wheel in your own relationship. And I’m even guilty with that one!
You may not even realize you’re doing it, but when you’re reconnecting with old friends, your boyfriend or girlfriend aren’t familiar with, you can easily leave them feeling left out and awkward. Make them know that you appreciate them and their company. You don’t have to spend every waking moment with each other, but when you are together, make the time count. Make each other feel strong, sexy and confident in your relationship.
5. Know When Enough is Enough
You can’t always fix jealousy. Since it has more to do with their insecurities than anything you do, you have to know when they’re not ready to deal with being in a relationship. When the thought of your relationship becomes a negative feeling in your chest that makes you feel sick to your stomach, or when the idea of your boyfriend getting mad at you for the millionth time over someone simply saying hi to you fills you with absolute anxiety, learn when to say enough is enough.
Sometimes, no matter what you do, people will not change for you. No matter how many times you talk, beg, plead, cry, or fight about it, some things just can’t be changed. You are your own biggest advocate, and you are much stronger than you think. Learn when you have to give up a relationship that’s toxic and negative.
Overall, reading an article on the internet won’t necessarily solve your problems. And every single one of you reading this has a different relationship that operates in different ways that works for each and every one of you. And that’s okay. That’s what makes this world so fun to live in – the variety of people that live in it.