Dating

5 Ways to Make Yourself More Approachable

Sometimes, it seems like nobody will ever be interested in us. We put on our sexiest outfit, go out with friends, and leave thinking that finding a date is totally hopeless. However, there are ways to change the energy you put out into the world that can make you more approachable and attract kind of person you want.

1. Put Your Phone Away

When we are constantly looking at our phones, we are saying, “I am more interested in this item than I am in making a genuine human connection.” It sounds dramatic, I know, but hear me out. Our phones connect us to so many incredible opportunities, but the one thing it can’t do is facilitate a face-to-face interaction. You might feel vulnerable without your phone, but you also might be surprised how much comfortable eye contact you make with a potential hot date.

2. Be Real

We often feel pressured to act our sexiest or smartest or most culturally aware. However, people can sense the false energy we put out and they’ll run the other way. If you want more people to approach you, be genuine. Do the silly dance you would only do in your living room with your roommate, tell the embarrassing story about how you tripped and fell in front of your middle school classroom. Genuine energy attracts genuine energy.

3. Stay Positive

If you want more cute guys to approach you, focus on the positive. Perhaps you should erase all of your stipulations from your dating profile, even if those qualifications are central to your being. “No carnivores, please,” should be changed to, “I love vegan ladies!” Focusing on building the life you want instead of the one you don’t will make people want to approach you. This concept isn’t reserved for dating websites – you can apply it to any interaction you have.

4. “What You Seek is Seeking You”

This Rumi quote apply perfectly to learning to give off a more approachable energy. In other words, there is something in you that resembles the things you desire. Do you desire a smart, loveable, and successful partner who is confident enough to approach you at your favorite coffee shop? That’s because you’re so smart, worthy of love, and successful. Shifting your perspective to understand this idea will help you maintain self-confidence and become more approachable.

5. Replace “I’m Sorry” with “Thank You

“I’m sorry I’m late” becomes “Thank you for waiting for me.” “I’m sorry I’m so awkward” becomes “Thank you for sharing this conversation with me.” Shame turns to gratitude. Everyone loves a grateful and reflective person who is confident and unapologetic.
Becoming a more approachable version of yourself is challenging, but the benefits are so worthwhile. Now, get out there, sans cell phone, and meet some cool new people.

Higher education professional by day, snack taste-tester by night. Committed to adventure in an unusual sense. I care about social justice, love, and many varieties of soup. Gratitude, always.

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