Bedroom Talk

No, He Doesn’t Want You to be Like the Girls in Porn

If you’re getting your sex instructions from porn, you may leave a guy wondering wtf? in the bedroom. We’re here to tell you he doesn’t want that.

This may come as a surprise to you, but guys don’t want you to be like that girl in the porno. When it comes to our boyfriends watching porn, most of us women have all thought: Why does he do it? Am I not good enough? Well, here’s the thing. The reason he watches porn has little to nothing to do with you. He watches porn because it’s fun and because it’s a form of entertainment.

1. Porn is Fiction

Porn is in no way equivalent to real sex. And this may seem odd because of the content on the screen and the action that goes on in front of it. But you have to remember that porn is part of the entertainment industry. In fact, it’s one of the most successful and profitable branches of the industry. It’s a movie making business with directors, editors, actors, and cameramen. A pornstar is just an actor. Yes, the sex they’re having is real, but their reactions are dramatized to an absurd proportion or, very often, made up completely. Porn is fictionalized sex. Just like, “The Notebook,” is fictionalized romance. Neither of them depicts how life really is.

2. This is Real Life

Now that we’ve reminded you that pornstars are just actors (albeit, usually unconvincing actors), here’s why he doesn’t want you to be like the girls in porn: What happens in porn doesn’t translate well into real life.
Outrageous moans. Fake orgasms. Cum in the eye. Despite guys being able to get off to the girls on screen, they don’t necessarily want that girl in their bed. Even more accurate: they don’t necessarily want that girl’s insane moans, dirty talk, foot fetish, clit ring, and cum sprinkled fake eyelashes in their bed.

3. Boobs are Boobs

Your average guy doesn’t need a girl with DDs, rock hard abs, and a bleached ass to find her attractive. Most guys are just amazed by the female form in general. Any boobs, big or small, round or pointy, is almost always going to turn a guy on. A lot of them don’t even need you to wear skimpy underwear or sexy lingerie to get excited. All that stuff comes off anyways. Believe it or not, lingerie can actually intimidate some guys and make them too nervous to perform.

Sidenote: ladies, if this happens to you, don’t take it personally. Some guys can’t handle you wrapped in lace and leather. That’s their issue, not yours.

4. Moan like You (Don’t) Mean It

This is so important so listen close. Don’t start moaning on command. Don’t fake it! Girls in porn fake it, because…remember what we told you? They’re acting! They’re getting paid to fake it! Unless you’re getting paid too, we suggest that you quit faking it right now and start getting real. Why the urgency?

Because, for starters, over-the-top moans can turn a guy off in a matter of seconds. This will happen if 1) he knows they’re unwarranted, AKA he knows he didn’t do enough to get you to sound like that. Or 2) he’s put in the work but he can tell you’re faking it. Even if they don’t always know how to, guys want to give you the big O all by themselves. If you fake it and they notice, they’ll be annoyed with their performance and with you.

Plus, if you fake it, you’re only cheating yourself. Making a guy believe that he’s pleasing you when he’s actually not is only going to hurt you in the long run. Keep faking it and he’ll never get you to the real deal.

5. To Put Things in a Different Light

Here’s the hard (pun intended) and honest truth: If it wasn’t for porn, most guys wouldn’t have the stamina to last more than five minutes.

On that note, let’s give a shout-out to the industry full of physically-gifted naked people hooking up with each other in front of a video camera at some rich guy’s house.

Dear Porn, we hate you but we love you.

A Massachusetts native who fell in love with New York City. Writer of poetry and short stories. Wannabe philosopher. Obsessed with red wine, chocolate covered strawberries and thinking about the universe. Dedicated to healthy eating and conscious living.

Check out her personal site for more!

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